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If you think about the world we live in today, it isn’t always easy to express ourselves, especially if what we do or say isn’t popular and/or defies social norms.
While social media has undoubtedly become an amazing tool for reconnecting with friends and family, unfortunately, it often seems like it only exacerbates our differences and drives us all towards a sense of conformity, or even groupthink.
This makes it difficult to find our inner voices, and stay true to who we really are. After all, when there’s an entire audience of critics out there on our newsfeeds just waiting to either celebrate or condemn our choices, it’s all too easy to silence our own voices.
However, when we silence our inner voices, we suppress our creativity and ability to think independently. We become a victim of groupthink, simply because we fear going against what is popular. This compromises our abilities to not only find our own voices, but also to listen to them.
Going through life like this is no way to live at all, and ultimately leads to a very dissatisfying, unfulfilling life.
If you’re feeling like you’ve lost yourself in the crowd, or that you’ve lost your own sense of identity, use these 6 tips to find your true voice.
How to Find Your Own Voice
1. Shift your focus to something new. Your life is the sum total of your habits, including what you choose to look at and occupy your time with. So when you think about what you’re regularly exposed to every day, what comes to mind? It may be that you follow certain influencers on social media, or that you’re constantly scrolling through your newsfeed of the same people doing the same things. Try shifting your focus to something new. Purge your Instagram or Facebook and follow new influencers with new perspectives. Or better yet, put away your social media and fill your life with new views. Get outside and go on a walk. Try out a new restaurant this weekend with friends. Or plan a day trip to a place you haven’t been to before. Let your mind imbibe something new and fresh, and keep track of how these new experiences influence you and your feelings. How is your inner voice responding?
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2. Look to your roots. No matter who you are or where you’re from, your personal history is vastly unique and intricate. Take a step back and examine where you come from, and how your history has influenced you, your values, and your opinions. It may be that you’ve been strongly shaped by your numerous siblings, by your mom and dad, or by your grandma and what she taught you. Look to these roots when you want to learn more about yourself. Your history is an extension of who you are and significantly influences your own voice.
3. Embrace taking risks. Letting go of your fears and inhibitions is undoubtedly difficult, but if you truly want to find your voice, you absolutely have to step out of your comfort zone. You will never know just how capable you are until you try something new, and you will never hear your own voice if you don’t give it the chance to be heard.
4. Journal. Journaling is beneficial for you in more ways than one, primarily because it allows you to explore your feelings in a way that also externalizes them. Write for at least ten minutes a day and focus on learning more about your own opinions and feelings. What themes do you see coming up again and again? What patterns are there? What is your inner voice trying to tell you? You’ll find that it’s much easier to listen to your voice through this simple technique.
5. Change your story. When you tell others about yourself, or when you reflect on your own life, what kind of picture are you painting of your life? Does it sound more like you’re reading your resume? Or do you talk about what motivates you? What excites you? Or what makes you get out of bed every morning? Take some time to reflect on your story. How you describe your life can either positively or negatively affect your perception of your own life. So make sure the story you’re telling to others (and yourself) sheds light on your true colors and what’s most important to you. This is an effective tool for not only discovering your true voice, but also letting it be heard by others.
6. Find your truths. We all know what’s most important to us. It could be our spouse, our children, working a fulfilling job, finishing our schooling, etc. While these things inherently reflect what we value most in our lives, what larger truths do they reveal about ourselves? Maybe you’re getting your college degree because you believe in lifelong learning. Or maybe your relationship with your spouse matters most to you because it’s where you feel the most fulfilled and secure. Values like these are insightful because they reveal the truths we live by every day, the truths that guide our inner voices. Find these truths in your life and embrace them. By doing so, you’re also embracing your voice and letting it express what you value most.
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