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We live in a world that’s marketed towards change.
More specifically, we live in a world that’s constantly trying to change us and who we are into something or someone that’s supposedly better.
Beauty products that are marketed to make us look beautiful, and promise to “transform” the way we look.
Foods and special drinks that promise to flatten our bellies and give us the “beach body” we supposedly need to be happy.
Medical procedures and products that are formulated to alter our appearance and unique features, all with the aim of making us more appealing or attractive to others.
Flashy cars that will apparently satisfy our need to feel young and carefree again.
Examples like these barely scratch the surface of all the ways we’re told we need to change ourselves.
It’s no wonder why it’s so hard to not only be yourself in this world, but also be at ease with the person you really are.
We’re continuously told these lies that we need to change who are, or that what we already are is simply not good enough.
If you’re like me and have been tempted to change yourself simply because the world is telling you to, don’t give in to the lies.
In all honesty, the only reassurance and validation you should be seeking for yourself should come from you, not the world.
So the next time you feel yourself listening to the lies of how you need to change, just be yourself, and follow these steps.
How to Be Yourself When the World Wants You to Be Someone Else
1. Take a breather from social media. It can be difficult to find your own voice or develop your own opinions when you’re constantly being fed a stream of others’ thoughts and opinions. While I’m all for doing a social media detox, sometimes a temporary break is all you need to refresh your perspective and boost your self-esteem. Without the temptation to constantly check how others feel about certain topics, or to draw negative self-comparisons, being yourself and having a healthier self-image will become much easier.
2. Say what you mean, and mean what you say. Saying things you don’t mean is damaging to yourself in a number of ways. Not only does it mean you aren’t being truthful about how you really feel, it also shows that you don’t respect your own opinions enough to be able to voice them. Be honest with yourself and open to others about how you feel. When you do open up, make sure it’s in a thoughtful, respectful manner in which you share your thoughts. You’ll be showing both yourself and others that you aren’t afraid to voice a differing opinion, and more importantly, that you’re an honest individual.
3. Learn more about yourself. So much of the time we hold back from being ourselves simply because we’re unsure of who we really are, and how we feel towards certain issues and topics. Take the time to get to know yourself. Journal for a few minutes everyday, meditate, or reconnect with nature. The more you can understand yourself and why you feel the way you do when presented with reflective questions or difficult challenges, the more you’ll know yourself, and the more at ease you’ll be just being you.
4. Stand strong in your beliefs. It makes it even harder to be yourself when you don’t feel a sense of conviction for what you believe, or if you’re afraid to voice your opinion. Don’t let your fear of rejection silence your self-expression, and stand firm in your beliefs. Though people may disagree with your opinions and for going against “the norm,” they’ll respect you for standing up for what you believe in.
5. Keep your company down to earth. The company we keep is one of the single greatest factors in determining how much we value ourselves, and whether or not we feel like we can truly be ourselves on a day to day basis. Make sure the people you surround yourself with the most are those that are positive forces, as well as down to earth. Your worldview is profoundly influenced by your friends, so if they’re there to reinforce what the world is telling you to change about yourself, you’ll be more likely to listen to the lies. Conversely, if your squad is supportive and values you for who you truly are, you’ll feel empowered.
6. Know that it’s ok to ask questions. Much of our perceived inability to be ourselves comes from feeling like we can’t ask questions, no matter how obvious. Norms, fads and what’s popular are all accepted too rashly, too quickly, simply because we are afraid to go against the grain and ask the question. Don’t be a mere follower. Stand up and ask questions. If you’re having doubts or questions, chances are that others are, too!
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